


Venison Voyeur

by Ihopuhopwehop



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Lily takes James "hunting", Modern AU, No animals were harmed in the making of this fic, kinda american? maybe, nor in the fic, silly fic, talks about hunting deer though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:48:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27343792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ihopuhopwehop/pseuds/Ihopuhopwehop
Summary: Lily takes James to "hunt" deer. See how James copes with the guilt of potentially harming his spirit animal. James perspective. Lily is a country woman.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black & James Potter
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Venison Voyeur

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, I thought this would be kinda a silly fic. Not a whole lot of dialogue but a little bit. From James perspective. No animals are hurt or anything, but it talks about it. Enjoy and Review:)

James was in trouble. Deep, miserable trouble. Or rather, the deer were in trouble.

When Lily had asked him if he wanted to go to the “deer lease” with her, he assumed she was inviting him to spend the evening watching cute deer graze and little fawns sleep in tall grass.

But when he had excitably told Sirius about it while they were getting ready for bed, Sirius had looked at him with a look on his face that screamed, “are you stupid??”

So, James, obviously, had to ask him what the stupid look was for to which Sirius brazenly replied, “You do know she’s inviting you to _hunt_ the deer not sing kumbaya with them?”

James did not know.

He had spluttered, “ _What?!_ What do you mean _hunt?_ ”

Sirius had made a gun with his finger and pointed it at Prongs, “I mean hunt _hunt_. Kill. Maim. Slau—”

“Okay okay I get it! Lily, sweet little Lily Evans invited me to hunt deer? Me, a deer enthusiast, and she didn’t think there was anything wrong with that?” James had ignored the fact that Lily was usually anything but sweet, but still thought she wouldn’t be as cruel as to kill a defenseless deer.

Sirius had shrugged, “You tell me. You’re the one she invited.”

James ruffled his hair, “Surely not. Surely…” He trailed off in thought. He knew that Lily and her family were a little on the poorer side, but he didn’t think they were poor enough to have to—he gulped—kill their own meat. They could just plant their own vegetables if that was the case but…well they were Irish too. Irish people loved “bangers and mash” or, so he’s been told.

James slumped his shoulders, “I can’t go, can I? The one time _she_ asks _me_ on a date, and I can’t go because of moral obligations. What a pity.” He sprawled on his bed dramatically.

“Just go and don’t kill anything.” Sirius replied unconcerned.

James took on a look of disgust, “and watch the love of my life kill me?”

Sirius rolled his eyes, “I know we call you Prongs because you liked to play deer when we were younger, but you have to know by now that you are not an animal. Well, not as animal as a deer anyways.”

“Shut up Padfoot. You know what I mean. That’d be like you watching someone shoot a dog. It’s just wrong.”

Sirius looked appalled just at the thought. “Just tell her you’re against the senseless slaughtering of animals for sport. She probably would gather that since you’re a vegan anyways.”

James nodded his head, trying to convince himself that she would still like him if he told her he did not want to go _hunting_. He cringed at the thought. He had then got in bed and resigned himself to tell her the truth.

But flash forward two days to the weekend, he was dressed in camo and black leather boots he had borrowed from Sirius, and was watching Lily drive the four-wheeler off the little ladder thing from the truck. He didn’t know what all of it was called, or why she had bags of what looked like some type of corn, but he knew that it would be aiding and abetting in the murder of peaceful little deer. He watched her with a miserable expression on his face.

She was smiling brightly. He cursed himself for appreciating the smile that she sported because of her hobby of animal homicide.

“Ready to go?”

He gulped loudly, “Uh yeah. Yeah.” He took a small step forwards but cringed when Lily looked down to change the gear shift.

She looked back up at him expectantly, “I hope you don’t mind me driving, it’s just, well this is my dad’s four-wheeler and since you’ve never driven one, I think it’d be safer if I drove.”

James nodded fervently, “No yeah. Totally fine.” He offered her a quirk of his lips but knew that she knew it was halfhearted.

James hopped behind her, his thighs pressing up against hers, so he leaned back to hold on to the little rails at the back that held the weird bags of deer food. Instead of driving off like he expected her too, she turned around and looked at him with her eyebrows furrowed, “Are you okay? You seem to be a little…sad?”

James couldn’t help the deeper frown that settled on his face, “No. no. I’m good. Just fine.”

Lily opened her mouth to call him on his bs, but he cut her off instead, wanting to get this over with. “We should probably go before it get’s too dark right?”

She stared at him perplexed for a moment longer before turning back around, taking the machine out of park, and peeling through the tall grass.

James had planned to hold on to the rails at the back, not knowing if Lily would appreciate him holding on to her waist, but as she flew forward, over bumps, into craters, he needed to hold on to something more sturdy so he wouldn’t fall off and _actually_ be killed by the love of his life. Then again, it would be retribution for the crime he was about to commit.

Instead of hesitantly holding on like he wanted to do because he felt lame having to hold on in the first place, he decided he would just make the most of the situation by slipping his hands around her waist and slouching down to lay his head on the space between her shoulder blades. At least if he died, he would die holding on to Lily. While she sexily drove the ATV.

He didn’t notice the shy smile that graced Lily’s face at his spontaneous snuggle session.

A few minutes of trail blazing led them to a little clearing with a metal tank on rods surrounded by trees. James noticed the stuff from the bags Lily brought were scattered around the ground.

When Lily parked slightly under the tank, he sat up from his comfortable position and waited until she got off first before getting down.

“Ok, so I’ll actually need your help because I’m too short to reach, but just stand up on the back of the four-wheeler” She gestured where he should stand—“And pop the lid off, yeah good, ok, now take this—” She ripped the top of one of the bags of feed off and carefully handed it to James. – “And dump it into the tank.”

James hesitated for a second, debating on whether this weird corn stuff was actually poison and would kill more deer than he was planning to see killed today. But when he looked back at Lily’s disarming smile beneath him, he gulped noisily and promptly dumped the corn-things into the feeder.

“Okay cool, now let me just—” She moved in between him and the feeder, he desperately tried not to think about how close her head was to certain parts of him, and started tinkering around at the bottom. He noticed she was muttering under her breath what sounded like numbers, but James had no idea what she was referring to so he just let her figure it out.

All of a sudden, the pieces of deer killer flew out of the bottom half of the tank, and several hit James. His stomach, his arms, his unmentionables, and one even went high enough to hit his head, though he wasn’t sure how.

He noticed Lily curse as she shook yellow things out of her ponytail and he stifled a laugh at the now knotted mess.

“Sorry, I didn’t know it would go off that soon.”

James was reminded of why they were here when she said that and promptly frowned. Lily had already gone back to tinkering though, so he didn’t say anything.

After they had filled two more feeders on the deer killing land, she took James to this little, square, poorly camouflaged hut. She parked the ATV behind the box building and then hopped off, extended a hand to James and goofily helping him down. James tried to smile more like he normally would, but he was getting closer and closer to having to pretend to shoot deer and he was really not looking forward to it.

“Now, we wait!” Lily whispered enthusiastically as she led James into the deer blind.

James ruffled his hair nervously.

They had been sitting for two hours and thankfully, no deer had shown up. It allowed him time to grapple with his guilt and flirt with Lily all in one go. About half-way through their waiting, Lily pulled out a bag of chocolates, much like the kinds Remus kept stocked at his house, and offered one to him. He gratefully took it and ate it, having not eaten for several hours now.

They ate chocolate and continued whisper flirting for another few minutes until Lily quietly gasped and stealthily pointed towards two does and a fragile fawn that had found one of the feeders. She beamed at him, while James panicked, trying to find any way to telepathically tell the deer to leave immediately. That there was a fiery redhead here to cause their demise.

As Lily started to joyfully reach into her black backpack she had brought, James couldn’t take it anymore.

“Please don’t Lily! I can’t take it anymore! They’re just little animals and I know that you and your family apparently hunt all the time, but I can’t do this. If that’s not okay with you—”

“What are you talking about?” Lily whispered furiously as James realized he had been talking much to loud and the deer were now staring in their direction. Good, he thought, maybe they’ll get the hint.

“The-the- the killing! The shooting and slaughtering of precious deer for the sake of sport and food! I can’t let you kill them! At least, not in front of me, please.”

Lily looked at him like he had grown two heads. Or rather, like he had sprouted antlers.

She held up a pair of camo binoculars from the backpack as she quirked a brow.

“We came to watch the deer James. Not shoot them. You have to have a license for that anyways.”

James was gob smacked. He could have been enjoying the day guilt free but no, instead he let Sirius convince him he was supposed to shoot an animal to win Lily’s affections’ and really, why did stuff like this happen to him?

“You mean, you aren’t poisoning the deer with the weird yellow nuggets? You didn’t plan to have me watch you murder poor defenseless animals?”

Now Lily was the one looking perplexed, “No?” She paused as realization shown on her face, then she giggled quietly, “No wonder you were looking so torn today!” She giggled a little more, “You’re a vegan James! And we have discussions about how peaceful deer are, why on earth would I—” She was now laughing a little bit louder.

“That’s what I thought at first! But then Sirius convinced me it was to shoot them, and I had already said yes, and well, I’d do anything for you, hence why I’m here—”

Lily was now kissing him, and he was sure the deer were watching amusedly from their happy little deer feeder, but he didn’t care. The deer were alive, he was alive, Lily wasn’t a murderer, and Lily was a good kisser. Who knew that the night would end with the deer _watching him_ get the snog of his life?


End file.
